In an unexpected turn of events, the ultimate celestial battle is set to take place as Satan, the infernal ruler of the underworld, has filed a lawsuit against none other than God Himself for defamation. The courtroom of Heaven is buzzing with anticipation, as angels and demons alike await the shit show that promises to…
WASHINGTON — Senior Pentagon official Gorzar Woklep confirmed rumors that UFOs are indeed just a figment of our imagination during a Pentagon press release this morning. Woklep disclosed intelligence reports that showed UFOs (Unidentified Flying Objects) and UAPs (Unidentified Aerial Phenomena) have been classified into three categories: “Look, it was fun while it lasted right?…
MOSCOW — During a press conference aired on Russian state media, President Vladimir Putin took a few moments to admit something he says has “been weighing heavily on me” and is “really embarrassing to me and the people of Russia”. After a short pause for dramatic effect, the Russian President threw off the blanket he…
