MOSCOW — During a press conference aired on Russian state media, President Vladimir Putin took a few moments to admit something he says has “been weighing heavily on me” and is “really embarrassing to me and the people of Russia”. After a short pause for dramatic effect, the Russian President threw off the blanket he…
BURLINGTON — Reporters caught up with the Vermont Senator this afternoon after receiving several tips that Sanders had been seen departing his Burlington home with a large backpack and trekking poles. The Senator had traveled several hundred feet into the wooded area that surrounds his estate when news outlets first made contact. After being questioned…
TALLAHASSE — Florida Governor Ron DeSantis revealed last week via a seemingly unprompted series of tweets how he learned to be so quick on his feet politically. The thread started off crediting the children’s game “Tic-Tac-Toe” as the foundation for his political movements throughout the past decade. “Tic-Tac-Toe game theory is absolutely how I make…
People are, in general, rude, arrogant and tend to believe their own ideas. In short, we stink. But there is a simple solution: calling kids names. Imagine a world where your name reflects your nature. For example, I might be called Fuzzy, Bad-Idea Man. Now here is the kicker: a child’s name changes based on…
Modern warfare is a brutal reality. The war zone no longer resides in distant fields of glory. Instead civilians and combatants are crammed into pitched battle around cities. Until we solve violent disagreements themselves, humanity needs a new way to conduct conflict. Fortunately, Monsanto has the solution. Imagine this scenario: the United States of America…
Look, this isn’t an anti-book or anti-intellectual thing. I mean, as an idea taster, I love books and thoughts! But libraries are anachronistic, aka they don’t belong in our time. Libraries provide three functions: The first one is just silly in the age of the internet. I mean I literally have every classic on my…
